The Short Version: Kira Gould’s personal experiences with divorce motivated her to become a certified divorce coach trained to guide singles through one of the most difficult and transformational experiences of their lives. She founded a coaching business called Getting Unmarried to be a guiding and supportive resource for families everywhere. Today, she helps her clients work through their emotions and gain clarity on what they want and how to make the most of their situations. Whether she’s running group workshops or sitting down for one-on-one coaching sessions, Kira reframes divorce as an opportunity to grow and pursue a happier and healthier life. She also offers her services as a real estate expert so that divorced couples can navigate new living arrangements with as little stress and hurt as possible.
Kira Gould’s parents split up when she was 3 1/2 years old, so she doesn’t really remember them ever being together. She grew up with two blended families; she had two stepbrothers at her father’s house and two half-siblings at her mother’s house. Although the divorce caused her family great pain, it also gave them the opportunity to branch out, start over, and bring more love into their lives.
In 2009, Kira endured her own marriage falling apart and had to deal with a partner who had a personality disorder. She did what she could to protect her two children from the conflict and move forward with a positive outlook. Now she is happily remarried to a wonderful man and raising a 9-year-old stepson.
Handling a divorce can be complicated, messy, and overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Not with a mentor like Kira by your side. This professional coach champions the interests of post-divorce singles and families. Kira founded Getting Unmarried, a divorce coaching service, to offer her insights on recovering from divorce in one-on-one coaching sessions and support groups.
“I’ve seen and lived through all angles of divorce,” she told us. “It gives me a very broad perspective and the ability to be compassionate with my clients.”
Kira also provides practical real estate services for families reorganizing their living arrangements. She can help couples decide to keep or sell their marital home and find new properties for one or both spouses as the dust settles after the divorce. Her hands-on assistance is invaluable as families cope with new circumstances and deal with emotional challenges on a day-to-day basis.
As a child of divorce, Kira has a deep understanding of the struggles, trauma, and potential fallout of a family splitting up — but she also knows what it’s like to overcome, heal, and build a positive future no matter what hand you’re dealt.
One-on-One Sessions Help Divorced Singles Find Clarity
Kira typically works with highly educated women in private coaching sessions. Many of her clients are mothers who are concerned for their future and the future of their children. They are often successful career women who are removing themselves from unhealthy relationships with narcissistic husbands. Kira said the average age of her clients is around 40 years old.
Singles turn to Kira to help them navigate their divorces, deal with the aftermath, and regain their confidence and strength. Her thoughtful and compassionate approach comforts divorcees feeling unsure of where to go or what to do next.
“The mission of my work is to help people find clarity and compassion when going through divorce,” she said. “Knowing their reason and setting powerful intentions can allow my clients to make decisions more clearly and move through the maelstrom of divorce in a more effective way.”
Kira identifies her clients’ motivations for divorce — whether they want to be loved, be better parents, feel more alive, or live in a peaceful home — and helps them map out a path to reaching their goals. After listening to her clients with an open heart, she reframes the divorce as a necessary first step to prioritizing the individual’s long-term health and happiness, and she empowers divorcees to make the hard choices that are right for their families.
“Everyone has a big why for getting unmarried,” she said. “And I want to help them get clear on what that is, and use it as a guiding force, or a touchstone.”
Support Groups Offer New Perspectives on Dating & Family Issues
Getting Unmarried doesn’t just offer professional support; it also offers peer-to-peer support in Santa Monica, California. Kira runs support groups for divorcees who feel isolated after a split and want to connect with people who have been in their shoes.
Absolute Support is a women-only group for individuals transitioning from married to single. Some attendees are middle-aged single mothers while others are young women at a crossroads in their lives. The group meets about twice a month to discuss the unique challenges of being divorced and dating, raising children, and moving on. Women show up ready to listen, console, and advise as needed.
“We can talk about any topic,” Kira said. “We offer positive feedback, and a willing and ready audience. We’re women in all stages of divorce, and we can help by offering a different perspective.”
Attending this support session can open women’s eyes to the many ways to look at and deal with divorce. By hearing someone else’s story, they can forge their own path forward with courage and confidence. You can join the group on Meetup and look on the calendar to see when the next support session will be.
“I’m a huge supporter of my clients. I’m there to help them discover. To remind them that this is their divorce, not mine, not their divorce attorney’s, not their mother’s, and not their best friend’s. No one but my client knows how their divorce should unfold,” she said. “My job as coach is to keep them in the driver seat, and to help them discover their own power or their own voice.”
Kira also has a co-ed support group for men and women going through a divorce and figuring out how to divide their shared home. The group provides expert guidance from CDFAs, attorneys, title reps, mortgage brokers, designers, and therapists. This practical resource can help couples move past the difficult discussions and find a mutually beneficial solution to their housing needs.
Motivating People to Reinvent Their Happily Ever Afters
When couples divorce, someone usually has to move out. The logistics of moving and sometimes raising children from two locations can put added strain on families already dealing with a painful circumstance. That’s why Kira uses her background in real estate to help make the process of moving much simpler.
She gives her clients a framework to rent or purchase a new home while offering personal advice on how best to proceed. She can talk couples through different solutions, such as having the children live in the house while the parents switch off between the house and an apartment, and recommend ways to minimize conflict in the future.
“Moving is stressful. It affects the children. It affects the parents. It can be scary,” Kira said, “but in the right light, it can also be exciting and a fresh start. Which is the energy that I bring to my clients.”
Dozens of clients have told Kira that she helped them change their lives and find happiness after divorce. One woman sent a thank-you text saying she had shed tears of happiness and felt an enormous sense of peace after participating in one of Kira’s workshops. After spending over a decade tossing and turning, she could now sleep soundly knowing that she had the ability to change her life for the better.
“I help [my clients] shift their thinking and start taking steps toward building a life that they love.” — Kira Gould, divorce coach
Kira encourages her clients to think outside the box when coming up with solutions to a variety of difficult circumstances. Every family is different, she told us, so they need to decide what will work for them. One family divided their house into two dwellings so the children could keep living in the same place while the parents had their separate spaces.
“Many of my clients are living traumatic lives before they come to me, and I help them shift their thinking and start taking steps toward building a life that they love,” Kira said. “Being able to do this kind of work is a huge blessing. I’m not a religious person, but the idea that this is somehow work of a higher calling resonates with me.”
Kira is a Compassionate & Experienced Mentor
No matter what your circumstances, you can rely on Kira to comfort, support, and mentor you through your divorce. Kira draws from her personal experiences with divorce to inspire families to recover and thrive as they enter a new chapter in their lives. She advises divorced singles in confidential coaching sessions as well as through in-person support groups, and she’s currently developing online workshops and other self-help products to make her unique brand of divorce coaching accessible to anyone who needs it.
There isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution to living with divorce. Couples have to work out for themselves what the best way forward is, and that can take time, introspection, and patience. Kira’s job isn’t to tell clients what they should do but rather to inform them about their options and give them tools to redefine and rebuild their happily ever afters on their own.
“Making a difference in just one person’s life feels wonderful and rewarding, but being able to shape many for the better is incredible,” Kira said. “I am humbled and honored.”
Original article can be found at DatingAdvice.com